That being said, I feel as though I have to explain something about Good Guy.
Some of you may have had an emotional reaction to the title of the book. Ithink this may be justifiable, given our current cultural state. So I will give you a bit of a story and explain why I use Good Guy as the title.
Partly, as a reader of comic books for many years, it was common for us as children to refer to villains as "bad guys" and heroes as "good guys". It wasn't meant as a reference to the genders nor was it meant to take away from the complexities of characters who may not neatly fit into a category of being good or bad. Simply put, as a child, it was just easier to describe characters in a story as such. Since the main character of Good Guy is definitely not evil, Good Guy is just the better fit. This does not mean he is without flaws himself, but rather it's an abstraction. You can be good without being perfect.
Another reason for the title was that I wanted something easy to remember. Good Guy rolls off the tongue. It's an alliteration, and also only has two syllables collectively. It's easy to say and easy to remember. The letters mainly have round, rhythmic shapes and so lend themselves well from a graphic design perspective.
The other reason for the title is probably more important. You see, something I have seen around very often is the idea of the "nice guy(tm)". In this context, allow me to explain what is meant by the "Nice Guy".
"Nice guy is a term used in the general public discourse and in popular culture that commonly describes an adult or teenage male with friendly yet unassertive personality traits. As a description, "nice guy" is used both positively and negatively. When used positively, and particularly when used as a self-descriptor, it is intended to imply a male who puts the needs of others before his own, avoids confrontations, does favors, gives emotional support, tries to stay out of trouble, and generally acts nicely towards others. In the context of a relationship, it may also refer to traits of honesty, loyalty, romanticism, courtesy and respect. When used in a negative context (sometimes capitalized), a "Nice Guy" implies a male who is unassertive, does not express his true feelings and uses acts of ostensible friendship with the unstated aim of progressing to a romantic or sexual relationship. The term is often used in the context of dating and romantic or sexual relationships with women."
Often people see my title Good Guy and think that I am eluding to the Nice Guy as is described here and make snap judgements as a result. Often I am confronted with the idea that I am somehow "making myself to be some kind of hero" or "victim of women's rejection". This is not true at all. I have seen a good deal in my life thus far, and one thing I do not do is make sweeping generalizations nor project insecurities upon others. So I am going to explain what the difference between the Nice Guy and the Good Guy is.
Firstly, it is important to note that these titles, as well as the Bad Boy, apply to both sexes and all genders, so they are in no way limited to males. This should be obvious, but in our gender charged culture, I feel the need to make this distinction anyway. Also, I must add that people do not fit neatly into the categories of Nice Guy/Girl, Good Guy/Girl, or Bad Boy/Girl, as that is just infantile thinking.
So what is a Good Guy? Well, how would you describe a good person? Someone who tries to make connections with other people, is a joy to be around, values his friendships and relationships. Has courage, not he kind of courage that involves confronting another human being or facing down an army, as is classically known, but rather with regards to moral ideals. He/she makes himself/herself accountable for his actions, both active and passive. He/she also shows empathy towards others, ALL OTHERS. He/she does not use others as emotional baggage, nor does he/she look to take advantage of people for his/her own benefit. He/she does not blame the world for his/her problems before looking internally to see what he/she can do to change any misfortune or injustice. A good person is honest, and is prepared for the consequences for this honesty. A good person is also willing to listen and encourage that honesty in others. A good person brings out the best in other people, but does not sacrifice his/her own identity to do so. A good person recognizes the difference between courtesy and respect. He/she gives everyone common courtesy until those people treat him differently, and then exercises different treatment of that person in kind. If a good person meets someone worthy of his/her respect, he gives it. A good person also recognizes that he must earn the respect of others, if he/she so chooses. A good person does not allow others to control, manipulate or coerce them. A good person challenges others, especially if they regard them as equals.
How does this differ from a nice person? A Nice Person is or may be well meaning, but often lacks self-respect. A Nice Person thinks they have to earn the approval of others, and allow their self to be reduced and/or shrunken to find that approval. As an aside, this may have roots at the home life, but that is hard to say, and I think it varies from person to person. Nice people do not challenge others, they would rather stay out of trouble. Nice people are polite, and thoughtful, but also want that same thoughtfulness returned, and become bitter when it is not. The reason? because they are being thoughtful towards people that DO NOT DESERVE IT. Do not make connections with people who have not earned it, and you ascribe yourself value.
If you see yourself as a Nice Guy, we are now conditioned to hate you for it. Don't bother trying to please everyone, no matter the reason.
Challenge people with your ideals and morals.
Do so unapologetically, it's more important to see who tries to understand you, even if they don't agree, than to make them conform to you. The same goes for them.
Be good to those who deserve it, because they are worth more of your love, respect and understanding than someone who doesn't value you.
Make people want to earn the respect you have, don't shrink yourself because you want someone to like or notice you. If they can't see what your worth as you are, guess what? They have just shown their hand.
Remember that relationships and connections are fluid, and some people whom you may have left behind in your life may come around. To be a good guy is to welcome them back, and give them the same opportunities to prove their worth as a stranger or acquaintance. Of course this swings the other way too.
I won't belabor the point any longer, but I will end with this thought.
A Nice Guy is a mask worn by people who have been taught a lie about human interaction and are desperately trying to connect with others.
A Good Guy is a person who knows their worth and is looking to connect with people who also are good.
A Good Guy is a worthy goal for all human beings to achieve.
That's where the title of my book comes from.